And I knew it would suck.

Dear self,

Do not take it personally. That’s what you’ve been telling yourself, because, its not personal, its business. What you need to understand though, self, is that it IS personal. That is why you broke the hell down last night. You kept repeating to yourself that it wasn’t personal all day yesterday while the regional manager dragged your sorry ass around all day ripping you a new one. But even the best people have horrible days when they’re constantly told over a ten hour period that they suck, their management skills leave alot to be desired, and that they haven’t done a single solitary thing right in the six months between their last visit and now. It wears thin. You earnt your scotch and tears last night for holding it all together yesterday. Kudos to yourself for not just telling her where she could stick her facetious comments and quitting. Ahhh, quitting.. thats the dream.
The clincher was that you came home and your family loved you. Kindness after a sucky day was what made you break. Perhaps you should speak to them, remind them that apparently you suck. Or better yet, remember, no matter what happens at work.. you rock as a mommy. I guess you’re alright at the wifey thing too (Para sticks around, and you can flatter yourself to think its not just because of the children.) 

The thing is, shake it off. The people who work under you think you’re great.  Your family loves you.  Let the mean witch have her day, she ultimately leaves.  Fix her gripes, make it better for next time she comes, and wait in anticipation as she searches for something else to kick your ass for.  Earn your money. Remember, for the first time in your adult life you have a savings account with a positive balance.  Celebrate. This job keeps your family afloat.  Thats a great thing.  And failing all of that, you DO like your job yea? Yes. I thought as much.  Keep that in mind.  Its not a horrible job, and on saturday you get to sit on Santa’s knee and get your picture taken. How cool is that?! (And your children believe you have an ‘in’ with the big man in red, thats also pretty fantastic.)

Cheers!

xx

Still and Quiet.

It is early in the morning, and all is still and quiet. It doesn’t happen very often in a home with four children, but they are all still sleeping.  I can even hear the kitchen clock ticking. I’m quite certain I didn’t even know it had an audible tick. 

I read an article yesterday by some young wannabe bagging out parents who make purchases like ‘kiddie treadmills and stationery bikes,’ and then in the very next paragraph started complaining that we are too techno savvy and ‘allowing’ our kids to be such tech heads is bad parenting and contributing to the obesity issue.  Well, first of all ~ I’m pretty certain she didn’t even have children herself.   Secondly, even though I personally don’t like the treadmills / bikes, I definately support the parent right to buy whatever crap they want for their children.  I seriously doubt that the purchase would be made to force the child to use it, rather because the children see their parents working out and like to join in.  Children mimic adult activities, and if buying them their own would illiminate injuries from trying to use adult machines, so be it.  Thirdly, technology is changing, and is ever present.  It makes sense to teach our children how to use all platforms.  It’s not that we’ve become lazy, this is just the next step in our evolutionary process.  Kids still play outside, I see them everywhere.  Finally, the ‘obesity crisis’.  In looking at my children’s schoolyard, I failed to see one over-weight child.  They were running around like, well, like children! enjoying being outdoors.  I didn’t see any technology being used other than balls and hoops and hopscotch, unless of course the technology was being used indoors with all the obese children, contributing to the demise of society as we know it!  Quick! Something must be done! 

Puhlease.

*sigh* Well, another day at work beckons.  Meeting with Regional Management today. It’s sure to be one lovely day of ass whooping for me ( .

xx

What? I was here all along… where have _You_ been?

Well, okay, the title isn’t actually accurate.  I aren’t really sure where I left off. I got busy I guess.  Peter was born in August of ’08.  So that means he’s around 15 months old now. He runs everywhere.  He hits everything. He’s such a _boy_.  He’s alot of fun though, my gawd he’s sooo cute!  The other three love him, which makes life easier. I’ve had another promotion at work, which saw us promote our home. We rent a much more modern home, with real windows! its bright, airy, it has adequate heating, and cooling.. We have new furniture.. its wonderful!

I am very slowly coming to terms with the fact that Boyo starts highschool next year!  Okay well thats a bit of a fib.  is anyone ever ready for their children to finish primary schooling? It’s scary. 

I got a new laptop so it’s a bit exciting.

We have new management at work, i’m not much of a fan yet.  Actually i’m hoping they quit soon.  hehe.

 

Good Grief, Not yet.

Peter has decided he might just be ready to exit.  I am having adverse reactions to this bit of news. We’re only 31 weeks pregnant, and am resting in hopes of not turning these contractions into full on labour.  He’s also head down and engaged.  He’s already being naughty.  Little punk.

 

In other news, the ‘big kids’ trip to NZ went okay. They were bored for most of the journey, but still had some interesting stories to tell. I’m glad they got to get a taste of their Maori heritage.  I think they are too. I missed them when they were gone. I’m also blissfully happy that they came home, mainly because the jellybean drove me batty with her CONSTANT talking. She even started waking in the middle of the night just to chat. So not into that.  It’s much nicer now she can distribute her talkings to those two as well as me.  Also! She read her first ever word last week.  My Grandma, (such a sweetie) gave me a box of goodies for Peter.  In it was a beautiful blanket with ‘baby’ embroidered on it. JB was showing off, telling her the ‘letters’.  I casually remarked that those letters made a word, and she said “I know that. It says ‘baby’.” :O My baby’s first ever read word was ‘baby’!  Since then she has been ‘writing’ non stop. All sorts of weird words that don’t really exist, but I’m not entirely sure they shouldn’t.

Fingers crossed for at least another six weeks for Peter to remain right where he is. I don’t even have a cot mattress yet!

Blue, Blue, Blue.

I’ve been pretty slack around here again. It’s not that I cant find time, I just ponder whether I have any real news to blog about.  That brings me to the most exciting news.  A few weeks ago we had our routine scan, and we’re expecting a baby boy!!

Introducing ‘Peter Aaron’ in his first ever head shot.

Promoted!

It happened. I was promoted at work ‘officially’ starting my new duties on March 31st.  The first week flew by rather quickly.  I still haven’t actually signed a contract to make it all legal and binding, and aren’t sure when in fact my pay raise will take place, but its a step forward! Yay forward.  I’ve changed depts. too, which is kind of thrilling. It’s all new and shiny ooouuu.  Now that it’s all official i must stop calling people ‘dumb fu*&s’.  It feels good and all, but probably isn’t the best way to earn respect. Just sayin’.

The kids are doing well, Chook nearly broke her arm, well, she in fact fractured it in two places by bending the bone.  She had a half cast for a week, then a pressure bandage for two and was told to not fall over for fear of ‘breaking it properly.’  Didn’t slow her down any though. 

Beanie girl is loving life, she’s enjoyed having the ‘big kids’ home on school break, so she has actually had someone to annoy other than her poor parents.  I took the kids to the circus yesterday, the cheap back yard kind, which really wasn’t fantastic for us adults. It was laughable really.  The kids totally loved it though, so I guess I get some sort of nomination for mother of the year for sitting through such crap! 

The boy turned ten the other day.  10.  The big one oh.  He kept it low key, not wanting a huge party or nothin (have I mentioned how easy this kid is?) he got his bike, and is happy. 

In other news, I’m now 21 weeks pregnant, and feeling it.  Work takes its toll, with me getting tired and cranky (see dumb fu*&s statement).  The good news is I’m slowly getting organised.  And we get to find out the sex on Tuesday.  So thats terribly exciting. 

I really need to update here more. i’ll try harder, I promise!

Should You?

It was raining on Saturday, and Boyo and I had just gotten his hair cut.  We were making a mad dash across the road attempting to get back to the car without getting drenched.  This required some fast moving.  Once we got to the other side, Boyo said

“WAIT!?  Should you be running like this with a baby inside you? “

“Huh? what are you scared its gonna fall out or something?” I replied. 

He was in hysterics for the pretty much the entire afternoon.  It’s nice to know he’s concerned about the monkey growing inside me.

Some Frustrations..

It’s true, I’m uber frustrated about work. See, I’m in this position where I’m filling in for someone in a higher position than I get paid for. I’ve currently been ‘filling in’ for six weeks.  Rumour has it, at some stage, I will be appointed if not this position, then one in a similar place which means a salary increase, and a bonus.  HOWEVER rumour also has it this wont be happening for another four months. That means I will be doing it for less pay, and no bonus for six months. That’s half a year!  More responsibility!  Managing a team of people under me (who currently EARN more than me!) AND!!! to top it all off, in four months, i’ll be nearing eight months pregnant. Why promote someone leaving on maternity leave?! It’s frustrating as heck. *sigh.*

On the up side, I’ve lost weight. Could be all the up chucking of all the eating.  Most likely is, but ya gotta take a positive where you can!  I haven’t been as sick lately, so now that I’m over the whole first trimester I’m hopeful that everything will run a bit smoother.  I still get really tired easily, and working (sometimes) 12 hour days/nights at work isn’t helping.

The boyo and chook started school this year all happy. The boyo got a new teacher for the school, a youngish guy, who seems to be alot of fun.  The chook got an older lady, whom she says is sometimes grumpy but she seems happy enough.  They’ve fallen back into the routine of it all superbly.  The beanie had her first full day at four year old kinder.  We pulled up to the gate and she tried to bail out the car with a ‘thanks, bye mum.’  (as she sees the bigger two do that.)  She was quite put out when i informed her I had to come in and sign her in.  She just keeps getting bigger.

I got locked out of my internet banking on tuesday for not remembering the password. Well, actually, I remember the password just fine, it was the stupid icon pick they make you do that i could not for the life of me remember the order of.  So now I can’t pay my bills! It’s perplexing and something I really need to fix tomorrow.. so ya know, we can continue living in this house, and eating, and ya know, having electricity!

Christmas recap.

Greetings!

Christmas went down seemingly with no real input required from me, besides the whole buying everything, wrapping everything and ya know, doing everything.  The kidlets loved the whole thing. Jelly Bean got pretty much everything she wanted, and then some things she probably never even knew existed.  Chooko scored big, and the boyo got what he wanted too.  Three happy kids = one very happy momma! (but seriously, which kid isn’t happy at christmas?) 

I have discussed the new addition to our family with the children.  JB is looking forward to having a baby sister, for she is convinced it will be a girl. She has emptied her doll cradle and seems to be living with the delusion that the baby will a) fit in there and b) sleep happily in her room with all her crap.  The chook said “What?! another baby?! OMG!! GROSS!! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?! ” (recently had a very basic discussion with miss chook about the facts of life. sex disgusts her.) And the boy? well, in true boyo form said “Cool.” and went about his merry way. JB asks me nearly every time i walk through the door “So, wheres the baby?” and is frustrated when I continually say “Right where I left it.”  It’s gonna be a long nine months.

I’m sick with this baby.  None of the others caused me this much nausea, and vomiting. I’m racing off the floor at work to throw up, upwards of five times a day.  It’s frustrating to feel this sick. I need to make an appointment with a doctor soon, but am still tossing up locations.  I really need to get a scan done, so we can have a ‘due date’.  I am trying not to worry about the health of this baby.  It wasn’t that long ago that I was being treated for cancer. It’s a little concerning.. even though I was given the all clear. (and told i would probably be sterile. Yeah, right.)

jelly bean wants a birthday party.  With the number jacks. Wish me luck!

Guess my news..